It's my annual new years eve blog post, but I don't have a lot to talk about this time. I've seen a lot of people posting about how their 2011 sucked, and earlier this year, I would have done the same.
But I won't, because my 2011 was awesome. This past week I seemed to have just what I wanted. I spent Christmas here, at my own house, with my in laws. Yea, I got to sleep in my own bed. Spent a few days with my parents, then back home for New Years.
After last year, where we spent a week too long out of town (seriously, my kids don't travel well), this is exactly what I hoped for. Yay. The younger one is a bit sick, but not screaming about it. I'm surrounded by good food and video games.
Well, I'm good.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Monday, December 26, 2011
Entirely too much eggnog.
As the title implies, my stomach has an aversion to dairy, and when eggnog is afoot I simply don't care. It always wins, but I make it earn every inch of ground.
Oog, I've been busy. Not busy-busy, just busy. My finals were all during the last week of class rather than in some bizarre schedule afterward, and my grades were all astounding. yay. I've been taking classes non stop this year. The breaks between summer and fall were nil, so suddenly coming upon winter break caught me off guard. I was going so fast getting all my work done, and not paying much attention to what the actual date was, that when it was over I was still going. I felt like Wile E Coyote running off a cliff. No more ground, still going.
So I cleaned my basement. The kind of clean that makes it finally alright for a toddler to come down and fill with toys. The kind of toys he can play with while his adult supervision plays video games nearby. Toys or cartoons. Toys or cartoons or snacks. Or some odd combination of all three which usually turns into a dance party.
My basement is awesome.
Oog, I've been busy. Not busy-busy, just busy. My finals were all during the last week of class rather than in some bizarre schedule afterward, and my grades were all astounding. yay. I've been taking classes non stop this year. The breaks between summer and fall were nil, so suddenly coming upon winter break caught me off guard. I was going so fast getting all my work done, and not paying much attention to what the actual date was, that when it was over I was still going. I felt like Wile E Coyote running off a cliff. No more ground, still going.
So I cleaned my basement. The kind of clean that makes it finally alright for a toddler to come down and fill with toys. The kind of toys he can play with while his adult supervision plays video games nearby. Toys or cartoons. Toys or cartoons or snacks. Or some odd combination of all three which usually turns into a dance party.
My basement is awesome.
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
CHILDREN
My two year old will often take two objects and place them across each other. He will then call it an airplane, and proceed to make it fly. He did this with two strips of bacon recently, and now I believe anything is possible.
Friday, October 28, 2011
I am not Jack Handey
It's been obvious to me for a long time, but sometimes I need to remind myself that people generally only see what you show them. If they're paying attention (or are simply more observant), they'll see more about you than that. Unless, of course, you're acting in a manner inconsistent with your nature, in which case all bets are off.
What I can tell you for sure is that my older brother ALWAYS knows when I'm bluffing in poker. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or bad, I just need to find a way to take advantage of that in Vegas. Then delete this entry before I go.
Anyway...
One Halloween, years ago, I went all out. Black denim pants, Tripp jacket, white pinstripes with a chain necklace, black nail polish and red spiky hair. As I strolled around that community college campus, two things became apparent to me:
1. If you didn't know me before, you wouldn't have known it was a costume.
2. Many of the girls that I recognized from around campus noticed me that day, and I was hot.
Now I didn't realize that right away. I'm what you call "dumb" when it comes to these sorts of things. It was actually a few months after the fact that I noticed. When I consider my own relative inability to recognize when a girl is interested in me, I realize the girl I ran into this morning was anything but subtle. Or intelligent. Or attractive.
I realized early on that a wedding ring was much like The One Ring. I put that sucker on and I become invisible. I made like I was scratching my ear, and I didn't get a good-bye. In fact, I didn't even see which way she went, she was just *gone*.
What I can tell you for sure is that my older brother ALWAYS knows when I'm bluffing in poker. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or bad, I just need to find a way to take advantage of that in Vegas. Then delete this entry before I go.
Anyway...
One Halloween, years ago, I went all out. Black denim pants, Tripp jacket, white pinstripes with a chain necklace, black nail polish and red spiky hair. As I strolled around that community college campus, two things became apparent to me:
1. If you didn't know me before, you wouldn't have known it was a costume.
2. Many of the girls that I recognized from around campus noticed me that day, and I was hot.
Now I didn't realize that right away. I'm what you call "dumb" when it comes to these sorts of things. It was actually a few months after the fact that I noticed. When I consider my own relative inability to recognize when a girl is interested in me, I realize the girl I ran into this morning was anything but subtle. Or intelligent. Or attractive.
I realized early on that a wedding ring was much like The One Ring. I put that sucker on and I become invisible. I made like I was scratching my ear, and I didn't get a good-bye. In fact, I didn't even see which way she went, she was just *gone*.
Saturday, September 24, 2011
The Fish
I woke this morning, like all others, went down to my desk
I hoped to see you swimming, but found you statuesque.
My office darkened at the sight, of my friend upside down
His belly up, his eyes now glazed, it made me want to frown
Our time together was so short, our friendship resolute
And now my friend I give to you the porcelain salute
A friend to mourn, a bowl to clean, for this I did not wish.
But of those that could have died, I'm just glad it was the fish.
I hoped to see you swimming, but found you statuesque.
My office darkened at the sight, of my friend upside down
His belly up, his eyes now glazed, it made me want to frown
Our time together was so short, our friendship resolute
And now my friend I give to you the porcelain salute
A friend to mourn, a bowl to clean, for this I did not wish.
But of those that could have died, I'm just glad it was the fish.
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
A strange background noise
It seems I post a lot about how I'm busy. While it may be true, it's not very entertaining.
When classes ended in May, we went to Minnesota. When with my in-laws, I play the role of spectator. They'll happily engage their sister in various whatevers and disappear with my children. I may perhaps receive a cursory glance. Most (not all, mind you) of the time I feel like Bruce Willis in The Sixth Sense. I think I'm interacting with people, but really I'm just haunting the place.
Mind you, this is not a bad thing. It does, however, take a day or so to get used to.
Upon returning home it was decided that we needed to find a new home in Buffalo. We moved in 3 years ago with no kids, and now we have 2 (and all the furniture that requires). We had one month to find and secure a place, pack everything, and move it. Oh, and I was stuck taking a required course over the summer. I've had more pleasant trips to the dentist. The only good thing about the entire ordeal was the end of it. It's a higher quality home in a better neighborhood.
Yea, summer courses. When 3 of the classes I want in the fall require a class I couldn't take in the spring, summer courses are the only option. On the one hand, campus is almost empty. I like that. On the other hand, I don't have much of a vacation.
About ten years ago, I had so many strange and vivid dreams. I still remember most of them to this day. These days, I can't remember my dreams at all. I don't like waking up like that.
When classes ended in May, we went to Minnesota. When with my in-laws, I play the role of spectator. They'll happily engage their sister in various whatevers and disappear with my children. I may perhaps receive a cursory glance. Most (not all, mind you) of the time I feel like Bruce Willis in The Sixth Sense. I think I'm interacting with people, but really I'm just haunting the place.
Mind you, this is not a bad thing. It does, however, take a day or so to get used to.
Upon returning home it was decided that we needed to find a new home in Buffalo. We moved in 3 years ago with no kids, and now we have 2 (and all the furniture that requires). We had one month to find and secure a place, pack everything, and move it. Oh, and I was stuck taking a required course over the summer. I've had more pleasant trips to the dentist. The only good thing about the entire ordeal was the end of it. It's a higher quality home in a better neighborhood.
Yea, summer courses. When 3 of the classes I want in the fall require a class I couldn't take in the spring, summer courses are the only option. On the one hand, campus is almost empty. I like that. On the other hand, I don't have much of a vacation.
About ten years ago, I had so many strange and vivid dreams. I still remember most of them to this day. These days, I can't remember my dreams at all. I don't like waking up like that.
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Friday, April 22, 2011
My Wife
If you didn't already know, I'm married. Now that the one person that wasn't aware, is, here goes.
My wife is awesome. Imagine this: you sit down for breakfast and you see Cheerios. You think, "ok, cool, good for you and all that". But then you have a bite and "OMG, Banana Cheerios?! I totally didn't see that coming!"
That's what being married to Becka is like.
My wife is awesome. Imagine this: you sit down for breakfast and you see Cheerios. You think, "ok, cool, good for you and all that". But then you have a bite and "OMG, Banana Cheerios?! I totally didn't see that coming!"
That's what being married to Becka is like.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Soda gnomes
The vending machines on campus are interesting things. I never buy snacks from them, they always taste like crap. I drink most of my calories, and I enjoy every drop. The two types of machines, though, are equally distasteful.
The open kind, the one where you can see the bottles, and see the mechanism that delivers your overpriced concoction. I frequently see them with bottles jammed at various stages of delivery. Then there's the closed kind with giant buttons on them.
When employing an open machine, I can see the mechanism at work, which induces a moment of terror as I can see every step and know just how it might jam, failing to deliver on its promise of a tasty drink.
When I hit the button on a closed machine, the gnome working inside takes a second to shake the bottle violently before dropping it. Sometimes it grabs the wrong bottle, but I can't throttle it because of the armor those machines are made of.
All the shops on campus charge more than the machines. Maybe I should just drink water.
The open kind, the one where you can see the bottles, and see the mechanism that delivers your overpriced concoction. I frequently see them with bottles jammed at various stages of delivery. Then there's the closed kind with giant buttons on them.
When employing an open machine, I can see the mechanism at work, which induces a moment of terror as I can see every step and know just how it might jam, failing to deliver on its promise of a tasty drink.
When I hit the button on a closed machine, the gnome working inside takes a second to shake the bottle violently before dropping it. Sometimes it grabs the wrong bottle, but I can't throttle it because of the armor those machines are made of.
All the shops on campus charge more than the machines. Maybe I should just drink water.
Monday, April 11, 2011
Deeper in my head, or, adventures in the hippocampus.
...at least I think it's the hippocampus. It wasn't labeled. I've had a lot of strange dreams throughout my life, the peculiarities of which are both a blessing and a curse. But that's a story for another day.
I keep dreaming that I'm either building a massive robot, or that I've already built it and it LOVES TO DANCE.
I'm still convinced that magnets will save the world. The gestalt is still rather nebulous, but it makes sense to me. It's a bit of a wave function in my head, ask me to explain it and it'll collapse. (so far)
In my dreams, I'm someone else... but I'm not. It's hard to explain. My brain eats Loschmidt's paradox for lunch.
Excuse me, the Rietdijk–Putnam argument is actively attempting to disassociate things from themselves. Also it's really late.
I keep dreaming that I'm either building a massive robot, or that I've already built it and it LOVES TO DANCE.
I'm still convinced that magnets will save the world. The gestalt is still rather nebulous, but it makes sense to me. It's a bit of a wave function in my head, ask me to explain it and it'll collapse. (so far)
In my dreams, I'm someone else... but I'm not. It's hard to explain. My brain eats Loschmidt's paradox for lunch.
Excuse me, the Rietdijk–Putnam argument is actively attempting to disassociate things from themselves. Also it's really late.
Saturday, April 9, 2011
The side door - do not use it.
Sometimes I just don't have anything to write about.
I live in a neighborhood where most, if not all, of the houses have a side door adjacent the driveway. I have come to loathe the side door. If it were a back door, it would be great. (The entire layout of the house would change, for one) But no, it's on the side, and some people think it's an option.
No, you silly people, it's not an option. I've missed packages I was waiting for (waiting in a chair by the front door), because the delivery monkey walked it right to the side door, and walked away with it because I couldn't hear him knocking on an outer stairwell door. My upstairs neighbor just handed me a package he said was sitting in the stairwell for two days. Sitting there because the delivery ape just stuck it the storm door.
Thanks neighbor. You think you could have shown me that two days ago, when you first saw it?
To anyone that approaches my house: right in front of the house is a door, a door with my last name on it. Next to the door is a doorbell (one that works). If you use *that* door, you will be noticed, you will be heard. But if you walk halfway down my driveway and bang on a door far, far from where anyone in my home will hear it, don't be surprised if you walk away without having been heard.
I live in a neighborhood where most, if not all, of the houses have a side door adjacent the driveway. I have come to loathe the side door. If it were a back door, it would be great. (The entire layout of the house would change, for one) But no, it's on the side, and some people think it's an option.
No, you silly people, it's not an option. I've missed packages I was waiting for (waiting in a chair by the front door), because the delivery monkey walked it right to the side door, and walked away with it because I couldn't hear him knocking on an outer stairwell door. My upstairs neighbor just handed me a package he said was sitting in the stairwell for two days. Sitting there because the delivery ape just stuck it the storm door.
Thanks neighbor. You think you could have shown me that two days ago, when you first saw it?
To anyone that approaches my house: right in front of the house is a door, a door with my last name on it. Next to the door is a doorbell (one that works). If you use *that* door, you will be noticed, you will be heard. But if you walk halfway down my driveway and bang on a door far, far from where anyone in my home will hear it, don't be surprised if you walk away without having been heard.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
My head
My head is a funny place to be. I keep having this recurring dream where my house is being attacked by 5 foot tall spiders and I'm fending them off with kitchen knives and makeshift flame throwers. I also have this one odd dream where I have a secret hidden private island filled with super high technology and global secrets, and nobody knows where it is. I fall into that category - I have no idea where my island is.
In my spare time, I'm rebuilding an ancient Mayan temple. At least, I think it's a temple. I have yet to determine what the building was used for, but it's large and ornate so I think it had ceremonial uses.
Magnets will one day save the world.
I've had a small statuette in my possession for some years. It was meant to represent me when I received it. It recently fell off its shelf and broke. It landed upside down and broke the head clean off. I have yet to fix it as I find it an strangely apt metaphor. I suppose I'll fix it when I feel that my head is on straight again.
There are times when I'm focusing so intently on what I'm reading that I start to disconnect from myself. I was once reading a book with a rather engaging story while I was very tired. At one point I realized what was happening made no sense, and furthermore realized that I was not a character in the book. That's when I woke up half slumped in my chair with the book somewhere under it.
I have this crazy goal of one day working for Nintendo, even though my career path is in accounting.
I'm constantly disappointed with how things turn out in my life, yet I'm almost always happy. I'm sure that's a sign of a deeper problem somewhere in my mind, I'm just in too good a mood to bother digging it out.
And now for something completely different:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDFgtFXfnv0
In my spare time, I'm rebuilding an ancient Mayan temple. At least, I think it's a temple. I have yet to determine what the building was used for, but it's large and ornate so I think it had ceremonial uses.
Magnets will one day save the world.
I've had a small statuette in my possession for some years. It was meant to represent me when I received it. It recently fell off its shelf and broke. It landed upside down and broke the head clean off. I have yet to fix it as I find it an strangely apt metaphor. I suppose I'll fix it when I feel that my head is on straight again.
There are times when I'm focusing so intently on what I'm reading that I start to disconnect from myself. I was once reading a book with a rather engaging story while I was very tired. At one point I realized what was happening made no sense, and furthermore realized that I was not a character in the book. That's when I woke up half slumped in my chair with the book somewhere under it.
I have this crazy goal of one day working for Nintendo, even though my career path is in accounting.
I'm constantly disappointed with how things turn out in my life, yet I'm almost always happy. I'm sure that's a sign of a deeper problem somewhere in my mind, I'm just in too good a mood to bother digging it out.
And now for something completely different:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDFgtFXfnv0
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Phenylephrine
Phenylephrine. Know what that is? It's a placebo. Right now I have something like the flu. Or just a really bad cold. All I know is that I went from a tenor to a bass in 12 short hours and my sinuses are so plugged I can almost hear.
Pseudoephedrine, that's the good stuff. That's the stuff that works. But can you get it? It's out there, somewhere. Hiding. It's hiding because it's afraid. Let's go over why.
Drug company: "Here's a new drug you can use when you feel sick."
Sick people: "Yay, it works!"
Stupid guy that makes meth: "Works for me, too!"
Drug company: "er..."
Congress: "Hey, you're selling a meth ingredient!"
Not sick people: "Boo!"
Drug Company: "This is bad PR. Here, let's change the ingredient from the one that works to one that doesn't."
Stupid guy that makes meth: "Doesn't work any more."
Sick people: "Doesn't work for me, either"
In this play, I perform the role of "Sick people". Right now, I am BOOING. BOO you stupid companies for selling placebos, BOO you stupid meth junkies that can't just huff paint like the other bumpkins. BOO congress for sticking it's nose in.
It's a strange sickness. No headache... no aches at all really. Just so very stuffed up. Can't breathe through my nose, ears plugged, head's a little woozy. In some places in my meaty form, all appears to be well. Others, things are pensive, with worried looks crossing the faces of those that understand while the youngsters play about. Yet other places, the encroaching conqueror has made life miserable, oppressing all and enslaving the populace to do their bidding.
Help me Pseudoephedrine, you're my only hope.
Pseudoephedrine, that's the good stuff. That's the stuff that works. But can you get it? It's out there, somewhere. Hiding. It's hiding because it's afraid. Let's go over why.
Drug company: "Here's a new drug you can use when you feel sick."
Sick people: "Yay, it works!"
Stupid guy that makes meth: "Works for me, too!"
Drug company: "er..."
Congress: "Hey, you're selling a meth ingredient!"
Not sick people: "Boo!"
Drug Company: "This is bad PR. Here, let's change the ingredient from the one that works to one that doesn't."
Stupid guy that makes meth: "Doesn't work any more."
Sick people: "Doesn't work for me, either"
In this play, I perform the role of "Sick people". Right now, I am BOOING. BOO you stupid companies for selling placebos, BOO you stupid meth junkies that can't just huff paint like the other bumpkins. BOO congress for sticking it's nose in.
It's a strange sickness. No headache... no aches at all really. Just so very stuffed up. Can't breathe through my nose, ears plugged, head's a little woozy. In some places in my meaty form, all appears to be well. Others, things are pensive, with worried looks crossing the faces of those that understand while the youngsters play about. Yet other places, the encroaching conqueror has made life miserable, oppressing all and enslaving the populace to do their bidding.
Help me Pseudoephedrine, you're my only hope.
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Everything is new
I've had a lousy day. I try to keep from using my blog as a daily log, but it sucked. I had a sore throat creeping up on me last night (during the new years festivities), and when I woke this morning it was far worse, and brought friends. Headache, nausea, vomiting, dizziness, earache... you get the idea. I wanted to die. It was also at 3AM. Inconsolable toddler.
Here's the situation: staying with my sister we only have one room. One for the wife and I plus two kids. When our oldest wakes in the middle of the night, we normally wait him out and he goes back to sleep. Here, he can see us. He screams until someone picks him up. Feeling the way I did put me on the bottom of the list to take care of the screamer. But the wife was taking care of our other one, throwing me right back on top of the list.
Something something wanted to die something something...
Most New Years days, I look back on how the previous year sucked. It's easy to pick out the bad moments, they're not exactly in short supply. But this year when I was trying to do that, I kept thinking about the new baby we had almost 2 months ago. That kid happened entirely in 2010, and as often as he screams and inspires a jealous rage from his brother, I just can't call the year bad. I say this the same day as the 3AM visit to the 'screamatorium and vomit expo'.
I remember being single living with my parents when my brother moved back in with his new baby, how impatient I was whenever she would cry for any (even legit) reason. Now when someone elses kid is screaming I look at their parents with sympathy.
What kind of monster have I become?
Here's the situation: staying with my sister we only have one room. One for the wife and I plus two kids. When our oldest wakes in the middle of the night, we normally wait him out and he goes back to sleep. Here, he can see us. He screams until someone picks him up. Feeling the way I did put me on the bottom of the list to take care of the screamer. But the wife was taking care of our other one, throwing me right back on top of the list.
Something something wanted to die something something...
Most New Years days, I look back on how the previous year sucked. It's easy to pick out the bad moments, they're not exactly in short supply. But this year when I was trying to do that, I kept thinking about the new baby we had almost 2 months ago. That kid happened entirely in 2010, and as often as he screams and inspires a jealous rage from his brother, I just can't call the year bad. I say this the same day as the 3AM visit to the 'screamatorium and vomit expo'.
I remember being single living with my parents when my brother moved back in with his new baby, how impatient I was whenever she would cry for any (even legit) reason. Now when someone elses kid is screaming I look at their parents with sympathy.
What kind of monster have I become?
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